The Enlightenment’s Top 5 Sassiest Writers.
Intellectual Shade, 18th-Century Style
Move over, Twitter feuds and clapbacks. The Enlightenment era was home to some of the most razor-sharp pens ever to grace the literary stage. These writers didn’t just spill the tea—they brewed it, served it with a side of wit, and made sure their targets knew they’d been roasted. Let’s dive into the intellectual sass-fest that shaped 18th-century English literature (and maybe inspired modern-day sarcasm).
1. Alexander Pope: The King of the Rhyme Roast
If Alexander Pope were alive today, he’d be running a viral Twitter account dedicated to epic takedowns. Known for his biting satire and masterful command of heroic couplets, Pope skewered society with precision.
Take The Rape of the Lock, for example. This “mock-epic” turns a petty aristocratic squabble over a stolen lock of hair into an over-the-top satire of upper-class vanity. And in The Dunciad, Pope goes full scorched-earth on mediocre writers and critics, calling them out by name. He was basically the 18th-century literary world’s Regina George: “Stop trying to make bad poetry happen. It’s not going to happen.”
2. Jonathan Swift: A Modest Proposal? More Like Savage Proposal
When it comes to dark humor and unapologetic sarcasm, Jonathan Swift takes the crown. His most famous work, A Modest Proposal, suggests solving poverty in Ireland by…wait for it…eating babies. Yes, babies.
Of course, Swift wasn’t serious (thank goodness). His razor-sharp satire was aimed at the heartless attitudes of the British elite, whose indifference to Irish suffering was the real target. Swift’s genius lay in his ability to make you laugh, gasp, and squirm all at once. If he were around today, he’d be the mastermind behind the most savage op-eds in The New Yorker.
3. Samuel Johnson: The Dictionary Disser
Samuel Johnson wasn’t just a lexicographer; he was the original king of the clapback. As the creator of A Dictionary of the English Language, Johnson didn’t shy away from using the dictionary itself to throw shade. For example, he defined oats as “a grain, which in England is generally given to horses, but in Scotland supports the people.” (Scottish readers: ouch.)
Beyond his dictionary, Johnson’s essays and conversations were filled with sharp wit. He famously said, “No man but a blockhead ever wrote, except for money.” Can you imagine him on today’s literary panels? Writers would both love and dread his brutally honest commentary.
4. Mary Wortley Montagu: The Original Female Firebrand
Lady Mary Wortley Montagu didn’t just hold her own in the boys’ club of Enlightenment literature—she outshone many of them. Known for her clever letters and essays, she often used her wit to challenge societal norms and gender roles.
She wasn’t afraid to call out Alexander Pope himself, who (surprise, surprise) had been petty and insulted her in his poetry. Her response? She implied he was bitter because she rejected him. Essentially, she said, “Don’t come for me unless I send for you.” We stan a confident queen.
5. Laurence Sterne: Breaking the Fourth Wall Before It Was Cool
Laurence Sterne’s Tristram Shandy was so ahead of its time it might as well have invented postmodernism. The novel is chaotic, self-aware, and full of snarky commentary. Sterne constantly breaks the fourth wall, poking fun at literary conventions and his own story.
One chapter is literally just a black page. Yes, a black page. It’s his way of saying, “Here’s a visual representation of how ridiculous you all are.” Sterne’s wit wasn’t about direct insults—it was about pulling the rug out from under you while you were too busy laughing to notice.
Why These Writers Still Matter
The Enlightenment era wasn’t just about science and philosophy; it was about shaking things up, questioning authority, and having a good laugh while doing it. These writers weren’t afraid to speak truth to power, often with a smirk and a sharpened quill.
Their sass and satire remind us that wit is timeless. Whether it’s poking fun at aristocratic nonsense or calling out systemic injustices, their work proves that a well-placed joke can sometimes hit harder than any argument.
So the next time you’re drafting a savage reply, channel your inner Pope or Swift. Just remember to keep it clever, cutting, and classy.
References:
- Alexander Pope, The Dunciad and The Rape of the Lock
- Jonathan Swift, A Modest Proposal
- Samuel Johnson, A Dictionary of the English Language
- Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, Letters
- Laurence Sterne, The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman
